My Ramblings!
Last week, dated 24th of May, I had officially tendered my resignation as a Brand Manager in the current company.
Of course, I got a job. Somewhere nearby. Can’t review now, but later I will. You can keep on guessing, it’s another advertising agency with the letter “&” in the middle.
But come today, I was totally
PISSED OFF with my own boss. He is so fucking moronic, you couldn’t believe it.
My MD and another boss has spoken to me in regards to my resignation, and at the very least, they wishes me all the best with my future job should I decide not to take up the option they offered.
However, my direct boss, whom I spent almost 90% of the time working with on a big dollar account have not even took the initiative to talk to me about my resignation at all, BUT, the best part is – that he has already informed Client on my resignation, last day on the 28th of July. Thank you very much! I would respect, if you had at least spoke to me on my resignation first and get my consensus agreement to inform the Client.
He hasn’t talk to me at all (not a single word) since the day I resigned. What’s up with the
COLD WAR yo! He seems all upset and emo about my resignation, but, trust me he don’t deserve to feel that way! For very simple reason that he does not even manage any of my expectations, always giving me empty promises when I on the other hand, has always try at best to meet his expectation. So why upset? And where does the upset begin with when you have consistently failed to managing expectation downwards?
And what is all the sidelining about? Stop talking to my AE to get things done from me. Talk to my face. I am still serving my notice period. But I would be glad if you do not want me to be part of the team for contribution. I would gladly take this as a holiday period man!
Be a professional and talk to me when it comes to business. We are not running a nursery school here!
I do respect him in a way of another, as a superior. This incident has totally changed my perception, nevertheless.
I am already counting down my days. And I will walk out the office on my last day full of pride. It’s definitely your lost!
Anger!
The Curse!
Monday noon, when I came back from a meeting, I discovered that my lighter went missing.
I clearly remembered that I place it side by side my cigratte box on my table, how can it went missing at a spend of less than an hour, when the lighter can even hardly walk.
I like my lighter you see. It's from the Maydaze premium. It's cool and I like to be seen holding that lighter, it gives me a sense of personality.
BUT OH-MY-GOD! IT WENT FUCKING MISSING. There and then, I planted a curse! Both LOUD and VOCALLY!
"Whoever that stole my lighther, will be punished!" I said.
'Erm... badly, and nasty-ly", I continued with some hesitation. And then I thought, what the heck, I might as well just go all out. So I shouted
"I curse the person who stole my lighter, if it's a guy, the penis will grow shorter everyday and when he have sex, he couldn't cum for the rest of his life! For girls, I curse that your pepet get looser by day and you can never feel a dick in your pussy when you have sex!" Phew... i felt bliss after the act.
The next day, to discover that my boss, who's the person that took my letter without telling me... I can't help but to giggles during the meeting...
Hehehehehehe... I know I know... I am evil!!
Mambo De Jumbo
I am stress for the week! I want to
Mambo de Jumbo tonight. Anyone keen to join? Please text / email me.
In the meantime, I want to tell the whole world that I really like Toni Braxton Ultimate album. I know it's pretty kinda late to discover, like now only, but hell, I think it's the bestest album of all.
And I particularly LOVE this song -
LOVE SHOULDA BROUGHT YOU HOME, track #2
See the lyrics for yourself. Am sure you gonna be in love with it too =)
LOVE SHOULDA BROUGHT YOU HOMEShould I even listen
Should I even try
Will I just be hearing the same old lines
Baby
See it doesn’t matter
What you say this time
Cause our whole relationship
Is built on one lie
You say things aren’t the way they seem
But still you can’t come straight with me
How can you think that you’re in love
When you don’t know the meaning of
Love shoulda brought you,
Brought you,
Home last night
You shoulda been with me
Shoulda been right by my side
Baby
If you cared anything for me
Then love woulda brought you
To me last night
Gotta hand it to ya
Ya had me there for a while
I was so in love with you
I couldn’t see past your smile
Now I smell the coffee
Boy, I got a wake up call
And it left the message
That you just don’t care at all
You can’t expect me to
Believe that she doesn’t mean anything
You say that you love only me
Your kinda lovin’ my darling
I just don’t need
Love shoulda brought you,
Brought you,
Home last night
You shoulda been with me
Shoulda been right by my side
Baby
If you cared anything for me
Then love woulda brought you
To me last night
Then you woulda been sincere
And I wouldn’t be in tears
And love woulda brought you
To me last night
Oh baby why
Why do men think that love’s just for the moment
Not over time
Please tell me why
Why should I think that
You’re gonna be sincere
Are you deservin’
Don’t blame me if
I just don’t believe,
I just don’t believe
That you’ll allways be here
Love shoulda brought you,
Brought you,
Home last night
You shoulda been with me
Shoulda been right by my side
Baby
If you cared anything for me
Then love woulda brought you
To me last night
Yes, I'm Very Stress
So, I came out with all this nonsense! I don't care,
I rike!
Thank God I've Got You... You... You... You... You... and You
I think it is utterly true to say that everyone in the city is
FAKING.
…faking from the
truth…faking
documents…faking a
relationship…faking the
personality … and sometimes to the extend of faking an
orgasm There are only very few people out there whom actually, try to at least, make friends
SINCERELY. I have my fair piece of cake.
And this entry is
SINCERELY dedicated to my beloved friend – Maureen, for being there for me, during all my ups and downs. I love you babe.
And to all the people who plays an important parts in my life
(… ya ya ya… the usual lame one, you know who you are…). Thank you for making it an exciting roller coaster ride. I love you too! =)
Believe me... I Had ENOUGH!
It's 4:28am on Thursday morning, and here I am still sitting in the office, waiting for FUCKING approval from my client on the ads that is scheduled to publish on Friday.
I can't stress this anymore
VOCAL... but
BELIEVE ME... I HAD ENOUGH! People, please at least cheer for me that I had finally realise and understood how meaningless it is for me to stay up late partically every nights, for the past 3 and a half year working like a slave for the company and the client. While my family, friends, and my life have been VERY MUCH NEGLECTED. It’s definitely a fool of me to finally become conscious. I should be SHOT in my head!
Back track to yesterday morning at around 11am, my client called to tell me that they have decided to do a Mother’s Day ad, in which was totally not communicated to us when we first developed the Parents’ Day campaign. If the matter were better well preempted earlier, we could have incorporated it as part of the strategy, however, truth was not told, and here we are suffering for the consequences. Worst of all is to have gotten back fired and bitten by client exclaiming that we were not well aware of the category movement.
Second call I received from the client yesterday was told to deliver the visual of the ad by 3pm on the same day. In no spilt second, I shouted to the client – Qi Xin (means crazy in Cantonese). Almost slam down the phone at my client, but being a servicing personnel, I have to act calm and professional under this kind of circumstances. And seriously,
I FAILED QUITE MISERABLY.
You see. I do put efforts to PR my client during leisure time, bringing them out for karaoke, drinking session, spend them lunch, buy them gifts when I’m oversea, and etc. But well, when it comes to a serious business dealing level, I just simply can’t put my dignity away to bound down to their ridiculous request. I am afterall, a human with fresh flesh and blood.
The moment I heard the ridiculous request, I already know I am going to get bombarded by creative team as soon as I break the news to them. True enough, everyone was annoyed with the idea I just put them through, however, after much persuasion internally, I have managed to get my team to agree on delivering the visual, at least on the same day.
But, my nightmare doesn’t just end there. Client, on the other hand, kept calling me and chase me for delivering the visual by 3pm, by hook or by crook. Our conversation started to get more and more intense, when I insisted that the 3pm dateline is not even FUCKING possible (of course I did not tell them that, I still have same saint in me), but will try to get it out before end of the day (like before 12am).
Client gave in in the end.
Then come today, client called and asked for minor changes early 9pm. Took the brief, get the visual done, and sent it to them sometime after lunch. Concurrently, FA is already in the midst of developing, because my dateline waits for no man!
Come 6pm. Client called again.
Asking to change the picture of a product. They wanted to use one of the picture that was shot before, sometime December last year. And they insist. I tried explained to them in many many many ways that it is not possible to get the hi-res picture in at this time because it is already off working hours. And imagine if we were to also insist the photographer to do the same thing, it is utmost seen very
FUCKING unprofessional.
So then again, I argue with client. Suggested that they do DI instead for this time round. Finally they agreed.
15 minutes later. Client called again. This time talking about DI costing. Client couldn’t settle with the cost. And they think it is ultimately our FAULT that we did not keep the hi-res picture with us.
My tolerance level just went flooded, soon enough, I exploded. I couldn’t care less anymore, but to explain the entire situation to her again in the ultimate sarcastic way –
“you are not listening to me, I said, we don’t keep hi-res picture unless we have used it before. It is definitely the most stupid thing to do to keep all the hi-res picture in our server wasting space when they are not going to be use and not sure when to be use. Our server have better things to do than wasting space, like, storing the important picture that were output before. In any urgent case, we are able to pull out hi-res picture anytime to save a life”, I said with much courage.
Client keep silent for a while… and said ok, but next time we should keep all still. And they insist.
I went totally speechless and berserk.
20 minutes later, around 11pm. Client called again. This time, they wanted to change background color, and wanted to see some color options, after so many round of FAs being sent over for approval.
My diva mood kicks in and I became even crankier, too bad to myself only. Because I kept reminding myself, I am a
FUCKING account servicing personnel. I have to listen to their point-of-view.
So I did listen to them commenting, but it all went out through my right ear.
Without much choice, I still did it. For the sake of getting things done, so the team and I can go off earlier, to rest, and have dinner, after a long hard day. Yes, we, up till now still did not have our dinner yet.
Then suddenly, my client called again, this time was the marketing manger. Called from home (yes, both the client were already at home in their most comfortable attire, had dinner, watching movie, but us the slave, still working in the office like there’s no tomorrow). Asking me to convert the PDF to JPEG for her. I answered in a very rush manner , like - erm, ok…yes, ok, erm, ok …. and bye, in a very flat tone, while I was typing some urgent mails away. After I put down the phone, I quickly converted the file for her in less than 5 minutes, thenafter, everything were already in her mailbox. The next thing I know is…
Client called again.
This time the executive told me, that why am I being rude to the boss. I totally went…
WHAT THE FUCK? I didn’t bother to explain myself as I was too tired to. Dealing with the shit is already enough to kill I don’t want to go through the explaining myself, so I just replied her –
“Huh? Got meh? Issit? Oh… ok” Soon after I hung up, I cursed
‘FUCK YOU’ in the most
FUCKING VOCAL way. And I was thinking, who are they to judge me, when I am the person here trying and giving my very best, at this wee hour to get things done, making sure that her ads get to run on the coming Friday? I could have been a bastard to just walk out the door, and pretend I forget about the dateline. But, I can’t, because responsibility haunts me!
Appreciation is what we are talking about! At the very least, client should show it in a very subtly manner, helping us to help them get things done in a nicer, less hassle, and smoother way. I seriously don’t mind the late nights, but at least make the process more bearable. Sometime, it also take the client to listen better so we all can work in harmony.
People nowadays have serious problem dealing with communication. They only choose to listen what they want to hear, others are just rubbish.
Great! How intellectual and helpful?!
I’m just tired. Really really tired. 2 years on this account has seriously squeezed me drained and dried.
Maybe I am just another typical Leo employee that likes to complain and taking the limelight?
In this case, I demur!
I am tough, I am sensitive, I am proud, I am afterall a somebody. Most importantly, I had enough.
At Maydaze
I guess, big scale gay parties are afterall,
NOT MY CUP OF TEA.
(Actually, I am quite inspired to write yesterday night when I came home from Maydaze - 3rd day event, but damn my neighbour, he did not turned on his WiFi and so I could not log on to write a better post than this! I blame you my neighbour. Ok, ok... I know i'm cheap, but hello, here I am talking about someone who's rarely at home, besides for sleeping, cleaning, and changing. Do you think I really need an internet connection, when I can get it faster and free from the company? And yes, as I am typing this entry, I am at the office now. How sad. I blame you, datelines... )Obviously, I was there for some reason - ogling at hot hunks, and of course, planned to get lucky. Sorry dude, if you think the lucky I meant was hot sex, sorry… you’re so fucking wrong. I was only planned to get to know new friends in my gay circle.
To start it off, I missed the 1st Maydaze event @ liquid. It’s completely ok, because I was actually caught up with work until 12am and then after I joined Joey, Elaine, Renay, and Beng Chong for dinner. Sad isn’t it? Dinner only at 12am, that explains why I am still a fat ass!
The 2nd Maydaze event @ Orange was completely a blast, and an eye-opener. I, for living in this gay-elf city for the past 24 years did not even realize the amount of gays that’s actually breathing the same air as me. Whooa…. I must say. It’s packed with lots of hunky and hot males. Totally adoring those gay fellas that put in the effort at toning their body, making sure that they take the centerstage at event like this! Meanwhile, the curry puff me, can only stand at the most dark and hidden corner admiring and taking a step back to think, why the fuck am I such a loser?
I will come back to the ‘why the fuck am I such a loser’ story later, but first, just let me complete with my thoughts.
Patrick, Lily, Kristen, Jacqui and I were there the 2nd night. It’s nice to have a group of friend to hang out with, but not when someone has a different agenda. Here, am talking about Pat. His agenda was clearly, to get laid by someone, that is at least decent for his taste. While the rest, including me were there to see the topless hot hunks. Lily and Kristen, was all the time with me discussing and evaluating the guys. While Jacqui on the other hand, was a hot cake, like every gay man there wanted to know her, BADLY. For god sake, it’s a gay event packed with tons to gays, and yet she still gets to be picked up, like for 8 fucking times? This is very sad. Very very very depressing for me, at least.
I did get to know someone who can be categorize as ‘Mr Perfect’ – M and R. Nice people they are, despite the fact that they’re a bit quiet. M, actually left a very good impression in my book. Smart, tall, witty, mature and most important of all, very the gentleman. I think he is about 30yo, with a successful or at least a stable career. He has all the quality that I am looking for, but unfortunately, an attached man. It’s ok, because I knew there might be someone as top quality as his will come to me one day.
Cupid has been nice to Pat. In our attempt to squeeze through the dance floor, Pat, found a mat salleh, and they started frenching after they knew each other for like, 5 minutes? Good god, that is totally so salah for me. Then, at around 1am plus, the cupid released his arrows to both Pat and Ken. Who came from a totally different universe but so happen to be at the same location where we were standing. Pat took the opportunity and courage to get close to him. And boy, he’s a lucky bastard. It’s really what they call – love at first sight.
The 3rd day event, while Pat spend quality time at the dark corner and Kristen running around to look for friends, I was even more a loser than just standing at the same place looking around, and generating more and more thoughts. All I move was only a few inch from where I stand to where I sit. Only to dance to a few songs that can really get me groovy.
For me, the party was great, the crowds was moderate, but the experience I had was seriously a disaster. I blame it to a few reasons:
1. I did not enjoy the house music they were playing. As R&B, Hip Hop, and Mambo Jambo as I can be, I think I shall stick to going Poppy, Velvet and Liquid at all times.
2. 70% of the crowds are high on drugs? Or maybe more? Or less? I don’t know. I don’t do drugs. Does that explain why I felt left out, so totally?
3. Like almost 90% of people there posses good and fit body, instead of a stuffed curry puff like me. So I felt pressured.
4. Being tan enough by nature, and under the dim light, I look even darker. And people came up to me saying ‘Hi’ in the most traditional Malay way – ‘Apa Khabar?’, I felt even pissed and annoyed. Which part of me looks Malay? Although sometime I really enjoy being thought that i’m a Malay, when I can actually shock them with my proficient language skills in Mandarin, Canto, and Hokkien. Boy, I am as Cina as I can be man! I guess it was not at the right place.
5. Some of the people appears to be a bit superficial? Only chose to hangout with good looking people. A typical example, I met Scott on the dance floor with beautiful looking people, but he can be as ignorant as a wall to me? Scott, is my best secondary school mate since 13yo. Our friendship came stronger years after years, as we share lots of ups and down, emotionally, and academically. But, all I can felt for that short 10 minutes on the dance floor was that he has became an ice queen to fat face and fat ass people, like me! I am totally pissed off with his attitude. I couldn’t care less, but to admit I have just lost a good friend, for he has changed to a superficial queen, while I turn my face to a different direction.
As I was thinking on my way driving home, where is my man? I can only conclude that the parties go-er type is just not my cup of tea? Or I might be wrong? At the sametime, I like to be seen in the clubbing scene? I am seriously confused.
I could have set a very high expectation on my life partner, be it a short term or a long term one, and even from every aspect of life. But I ain’t complaining because what I am looking for is the quality than quantity. I have the habit of getting things right in the first place. So does it really explain my own questions? Confused… yet again. I just couldn’t compromise / settle for the worst.
God… save me. I’m really really really confused now.
Honestly, this post is not directed to anyone. I beg for your mercy if I have in a way or another hurt anyone’s feeling. I am merely just expressing my thought as I try to portrays the utopia of my gay life.
This might not be the end of my entry for this post. I lost some thought here and there as I was typing it. Damn the stupid fellas that interrupted me! I will continue when my thoughts are back.
